Twelve years ago, the biggest concern I had around social media and inappropriate images was simple: somebody had to take the picture. And then somebody had to send it. When that image was shared, we knew what it was. It was identifiable. And there were laws around it.
That world is gone.
Today, anyone with a phone or a device can grab an image from anywhere . Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, a school website, a church directory and transform it into anything they want. Something that looks like that person. Sounds like that person. Something completely fabricated and completely convincing.
This is called a deepfake. And it is happening every single day in schools and homes just like yours.
I have been speaking about deepfakes for three years. Sadly, things have only gotten worse. It is an incredibly hard conversation to have. But it is one we must have if we are going to know how to best protect our kids.
What Exactly Is a Deepfake?
A deepfake is AI-generated media in which a real person’s face or voice is placed onto content they never created and never consented to. For women and girls, this most commonly means taking a real photograph and using artificial intelligence to fabricate explicit, pornographic content. And here is the thing…the technology is not complicated. It is not expensive. Much of it is free. It requires one clear photograph and a few clicks. Your daughter’s homecoming picture. Her school photo. A screenshot from TikTok. That is all it takes. Something your daughter does….sharing memories online that is normal and what every other teen is doing…can now be almost instantaneously weaponized against her.
The Numbers Are Alarming
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96% of all deepfake videos online are non-consensual pornography, overwhelmingly targeting women and girls. In the United States, documented cases exist in middle and high schools across the country. The average age of victims is twelve to fourteen years old. This is not to say it can not happen to young men. It can. And does. Usually via sextortion. But the large majority is young girls and women. So what is sextortion? I want to make the point that the “bad guy” we worry about is not always the adult behind the screen, hidden in a dark room in another country. It can be. It can also be a teen from her school. But when it comes to sextortion, it is largely about a predator online trying to harm your daughter.
Deepfakes can and are being used as blackmail. A predator obtains your child’s photo, creates a fabricated explicit image, and threatens to distribute it unless she sends money or real explicit content. FBI reports of sextortion targeting minors have increased by over 300% in recent years. Most victims tell no one because they are terrified and because they believe it is their fault. Shame for a teenager is everything. They will do next to anything to keep their friends and family from seeing the images, even though they had nothing to do with the creation of the images.
It is not their fault. But they need to hear that from you before something happens.
What You Can Do Right Now
Have the conversation before something happens. Use the word deepfake. Make sure your child knows their photos can be used without their consent and that if it ever happens, they will not be in trouble for coming to you.
If it happens, document everything. Report to the platform. Report to law enforcement. Visit StopNCII.org, which is a free tool that helps prevent fabricated images from spreading further.
Say these words out loud to your child: If anyone ever uses your image to hurt or scare you, come to me immediately. I will believe you. And we will handle it together. Have the hard conversation.